Healing stress and difficult emotions

The more one sympathizes with oneself, without feeling sorry for oneself, the more compassion one will draw from those around one.

Nowadays, very often, the expectations that adults have (parents, teachers, friends) from teenagers are very high. However, sometimes it seems that teenagers themselves are more critical of themselves than others around them.
As a result, stress and difficult emotions increase rather than decrease, despite the fact that teens believe that if they are critical of themselves they will be more motivated.

But what is the solution that experts suggest for a teenager to use his potential without criticizing himself?
Leading researcher Kristin Neff introduces the concept of self-compassion in adults and children. He defines self-compassion as being kind to oneself, being aware of one’s painful feelings, and recognizing that all people experience the same feelings at some point in their lives, so I am not the only one having a difficult time in my life. A 2014 study of 90 teenagers aged 11-18 by Karen Bluth and Priscilla Blanton in the United States was published in the Journal of Positive Psychology.

The study found that adolescents’ self-compassion was associated with lower perceptions of stress and negative emotions, as well as higher life satisfaction. But how do we cultivate self-compassion in ourselves and then in adolescents without confusing it with self-pity? There is a huge difference between the two terms.

In self-pity the person enters the place of the victim, feels wronged, feels guilty and finally immobilized, staying in a miserable attitude of life.
On the contrary, in self-compassion the person treats himself with kindness and kindness, recognizing his difficulties, which he knows that his fellow human beings have also experienced. Through this attitude towards the self the adolescent is finally mobilized to act better without experiencing intense stress criticizing himself.

Let’s try an exercise in self-compassion by speaking within ourselves. when experiencing a difficult emotional state: I know what you are going through is difficult, I am here for you, you are not alone
Life’s challenges can sometimes be painful. I’m sorry you have to go through all this. I love you and we will be fine soon. This painful condition has nothing to do with whether you are bad or inadequate.

Everyone has painful challenges in their life. You are not punished for something.
You can cry whenever you need it, we will find our comfort again when we feel it. The more one sympathizes with oneself, without feeling sorry for oneself, the more compassion one will draw from those around one.